B.4 Alliance Meeting Excerpt
Yeah ok, I’m not supposed to do this but the meeting was so cool, how could I not? The following is the print version of a recorded meeting with the Intergalactic Alliance Committee that happened yesterday – with my comments interspersed.
The meeting started off pretty boring. Everyone logged in from their respective areas; the Ox (E’lish only) and the Blotrats from their ships in Orbit, the Certwa and the Opthalions from their planets -the feed being relayed from the Ox ships (I still don’t know how their super long range communications work but apparently we have people trying to reverse engineer them), and the IGL’s from Earth- me, Jared the Blotrats representative and three others who are near to being declared an official representative.
So I had one screen open for each person in attendance (yes nine screens) which only left me with one spare to control the recording software.
The meeting started off with blah-blah news. You know the administriva stuff. E’lish did announce that I was the official representative to the Ox which was cool. Then the real meeting started. On the agenda was the four standing items that are always there:
- Alliance and Treaty news (this is the Administriva I was talking about)
- Notification of Alliance and Treaty breeches
- Notification of Threats to the Alliance
- Notification of possible new Alliance members
“Next Item,” E’lish said. She is acting as the Committee Chair this month. “Notification of Alliance and Treaty breeches. The floor is open.” She said it all in English.
“I would like to start off by notifying the Alliance Committee that I have a complaint to issue on behalf of the Blotrat Mining Colony in system X3356,” said Jyond, the Blotrat representative. Of course didn’t understand a word he said since he said it in his own language, but my computer has a translation program built in.
“The system has notified us,” Jyond continued,”that several of their Cargo transportation devices have gone missing from the space station orbiting around X3356-4.” I wish our translation of the Blotrat lanuage was a bit better, because I’m sure they don’t call those really cool gravity-defying floating cargo beds “Cargo Transportation Devices”. Although, they might. The Blotrat don’t have much of an imagination.
“Thank you for informing us Jyond, however misplaced items are not the direct concern of the Committee. Are you requesting aid in their retrieval?” E’lish asked.
“No,” said Jyond, “I am accusing the Certwa of stealing from us. Again.”
Oh yeah. Things just got interesting.
“Jyond that is a serious accusation. Do you have proof?” E’lish asked. If the Certwa had a human representative she or he would be asking. We humans seem to have taken on the role of neutral party. That isn’t exactly true but whatever – that’s a topic for another post.
Jyond’s screen went black for a moment and then a video appeared that looked to me like surveillance camera footage. It was obviously on a space station. There was a window or something similar to that in the background. There were two Blotrats working quickly to move cargo around in a cargo hold. After a moment the two Blotrats finished taking the last of the cargo off of the “Cargo Transportation Devices” and leaned them up against a wall. Then they walked off the screen.
A few moments later a two of the Cargo Transportation Devices were moved quickly out of the screen shot. I missed it completely. However the image rewound to just before the movement and went forward in slow motion. There was a small green repitilan looking blur pushing the devices out of the screen. A Certwan.
The screen went black again and Jyond returned.
“The gravity in this section of the station was lowered by half to give our labourers an easier time in handling the cargo,” Jyond said, “With it reduced in such a manner, and having just allowed a ship of five Certwa to dock with the station, it would have been easy for the Certwa to organize the thief.”
I looked at the screens around me. I couldn’t see what the Opthalion was thinking since they are completely covered from head to toe, however the Certwan representative, “Creek” as we call him, didn’t look nervous at all. E’lish looked like she’d swallowed something unpleasant and Jared (the Blotrat Liasion) looked proud and conceited. I guess that isn’t unusual for Jared.
“I call upon the Certwa Representative to respond to these claims.” E’lish said having regained her composure.
The Certwa can understand the Ox language and the Blotrat language (in part) however they have not been able to learn to speak in these other languages. Creek shouted out a series of incomprehensible shrieks and shrills, most of which were beyond human hearing thank the Gods of Earth. E’lish would be the only person who could understand what Creek said so we would have to rely on her to enter it into the translation system correctly.
She entered it as text, typing it out in English. It said, “The Certwa people can not be held responsible for the lack of security surrounding the Cargo area of the station. We are a people who have always taken what we need. We still have difficulty understanding the concepts of thief. If there is any retribution required it should be dealt with on our behalf by the races that elevated us to this level of interaction with alien cultures.”
E’lish looked pale. Not pretty for someone with Golden skin. She started shrieking at Creek and typed out what she was saying.
“We, the Ox, one of the two species who elevated you from your secluded ways request that you return the Cargo Transportation Devices to the Blotrat that you have taken from.”
“I agree with the Ox that the Certwa should return what they have not earned.” Oshin said. I like hearing him speak. He has a kind of rumble to his voice. And he speaks Blotrat which is at least translatable. I hear he is learning English and Mandarin too.
Creek replied with a bunch more squawky nonsense and E’lish typed it up even though I could tell she didn’t really want to.
“We have a need of these devices. We have them now in our possession. We would need something in return to give them up.”
Finally I understood what Gary – my boss – meant when he called the Certwa the Freeloaders of the Universe. And they had a great meal ticket, the soft hearted Ox. I could already tell that E’lish was trying to come up with something she could give the Certwa in exchange for the stolen goods.
“This is ridiculous,” Jyond said. Jared his Liasion didn’t say anything. He wasn’t supposed to get involved unless it looked like he wasn’t going to get the goods back for his representative. And Jared knows as well as I do that the Ox would probably cave in and give the Certwa something. But it was my job to ensure that the Ox-Human relationship wasn’t jeopardized. So I did something that is technically bending those rules. I spoke up for the Ox.
“I would like to say something,” I said. I guess I cleared my throat because it was recorded but I don’t remember doing it. “I think that the Certwa should give the Cargo Transportation Devices back without receiving something in return. If the Certwa wish to continue dealing on this level of interaction with other alien races they should adhere to the same rules as all the other races on this committee.”
There I said it. I probably shouldn’t have.
E’lish and Jared looked shocked. Jyond looked thrilled and the Certwa… well I still have trouble reading their facial expressions but I think Creek was dumbfounded. I had a cousin who acted like Creek once. He needed a swift kick in the butt and no hand outs for a year before he learnt to do things for himself. I wonder how long it would take for the Certwa.
“I am in agreement with Earth’s Dalton.” Oshin said. I was surprised and thankful that he was the first to say something. Jyond agreed next.
It took E’lish a few moments before she agreed. She even said it in the Certwa lanuage and just typed it for us. It must have been really hard for her. The Ox still feel responsible for the Certwa.
Creek looked like he was ready to jump up and down shrieking. They did look ape-like so it wasn’t hard to imagine it. Finally he spoke to someone off the screen and then spoke to E’lish.
“We accept these terms for now. The devices will be returned. However we will wish to discuss the idea the human suggested among ourselves before we commit to it.”
I breathed a sigh of relief, but that was short lived. The text scrolling across the screen stopped well before Creek finished speaking. E’lish had left something out. I waited for her to type something else instead she just sat there until Creek was finished. Then she spoke.
“At this time I would like to notify the council that I will not relay insults.”
I looked at Creek and he was defiantly glaring, and now I was sure it was at me. Oops.
“Now,” E’lish continued. “Is there anyone else who would like to notify the council of other Alliance or Treaty breeches?”
No one said anything and the rest of the meeting was over quickly. I got a quick message in my mailbox from E’lish requesting a meeting with me. I’m sure you can guess what was said.
All in all not bad for my first meeting as the official Liaison to the Ox. I made an impression on the Blotrats and the Opthalions, scared the Ox, and made an enemy out of the Certwa.
Over and Out
PS: The Ox have received word from the Deputy Minister. They get to move into Orbs 1 and 2 at the end of next week. And I get to help coordinate…on location. My first field trip.
